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Totally lost it!
Nov. 15th, 2008 11:10 pmI've had an awful day today, and this afternoon I totally lost it and had a full-scale paddy.
The reason is that I spent the morning doing an inventory of food, cleaning materials and so forth, and then an online-shop. After lunch, yet again I had a deskful of paper to deal with, when I really wanted to be doing something else.
The shredder was playing up, my clumsy arthritic hands kept dropping things and People (They know who they are) just wouldn't leave me alone; if it's obvious that I'm busy, stressed out and in a very bad mood, is that the right time to ask me to do anything, or look for anything, or indeed, to look at anything? Have some sense! Or do you really like winding me up just one more turn?
I got so wound up and angry I thought I was going to burst a blood vessel. I haven't been like that for years and years.
Now, what is the cause of all this stress? It's the sodding floods of paper I get through the letter-box every day. I can't just chuck it all out; I have to go through it shredding anything which identifies me or any of my personal or financial details, sort out the stuff for recycling and file what's left over. The filing drives me mad. I seem to be forever having to start a new file. Who are all these people who torture me with bits of paper? Many of them are the health professionals who are dedicated to keeping me alive and healthy, so why, oh why can't they communicate by e-mail, which I can immediately file electronically?
I only did all this about ten days ago. Where does it all come from, and why?
And why, La Redoute, when you send me a sodding letter almost every week with my customer number on it, can I not access my web account when I want to buy a new top, because that self same number is not now recognised? And why, when you tell me over the telephone that you've fixed it, can I still not access it two days later? What is the point of all these floods of paper and e-mail if you can't keep my account sorted out so that I can actually buy stuff? What do I have to do to get you to sort it out? You want my money, right?
And why, Mr Petplan, when I've told you that I'm not renewing my insurance with you do you keep harrassing me with unneccessary letters?
Charles was, as ever, sympathetic and kept bringing me cups of tea and telling me to calm down because he was worried about me. I don't know what I've done to deserve such a nice son, really.
Now I'm torn about tomorrow! I've sorted out my desk, caught up with all the filing and shredding and could actually get on with some writing, which is what I wanted to do when I started all this, BUT, the weather forecast for tomorrow is great, even better than it's been today and I've already agreed to go to the seaside and have a pub lunch. I know that I shall enjoy it if I go, but I've only got Monday and Friday with nothing booked for me to do next week, and after I've done the other things, I'm usually too worn out to write.
And now I have a hideously painful knee, which I'm perfectly sure is as a result of the stress I've put myself through today, so I probably won't sleep tonight.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!
The other night when I couldn't sleep, I wickedly ordered myself a new cheap slimline digital camera from Amazon. I've been dying to get a little slim lightweight one ever since I bought Charles' last year; I wanted to get the same one I bought him, but it seems to be discontinued so I've orderd another Samsung, only this one is PINK!! That's only so that I can find it easily in the depths of my handbag, of course!! I felt terribly guilty about it until Charles pointed out that the camera, with an extra 2Gb card and a PINK camera case had cost less than £70, that I reconciled myself to the fact that I'd done such an extravagant thing, but afterwards I thought that I probably should allow myself one little luxury out of the back-dated DLA lump sum. It will all disappear soon enough in electricity bills, I don't doubt.
Now that I've stopped feeling guilty about it, I'm impatient to get my mitts on it. The card and the case, which came from Amazon associates have already arrived, and I really thought the camera would come today, but no. Sulk!
And where are my cheap purple slouch boots that I ordered a week or more ago? I want to flash them at my next writing course!
I think I'd better have an early night (for me) if I'm going to be fresh for a day out tomorrow!
The reason is that I spent the morning doing an inventory of food, cleaning materials and so forth, and then an online-shop. After lunch, yet again I had a deskful of paper to deal with, when I really wanted to be doing something else.
The shredder was playing up, my clumsy arthritic hands kept dropping things and People (They know who they are) just wouldn't leave me alone; if it's obvious that I'm busy, stressed out and in a very bad mood, is that the right time to ask me to do anything, or look for anything, or indeed, to look at anything? Have some sense! Or do you really like winding me up just one more turn?
I got so wound up and angry I thought I was going to burst a blood vessel. I haven't been like that for years and years.
Now, what is the cause of all this stress? It's the sodding floods of paper I get through the letter-box every day. I can't just chuck it all out; I have to go through it shredding anything which identifies me or any of my personal or financial details, sort out the stuff for recycling and file what's left over. The filing drives me mad. I seem to be forever having to start a new file. Who are all these people who torture me with bits of paper? Many of them are the health professionals who are dedicated to keeping me alive and healthy, so why, oh why can't they communicate by e-mail, which I can immediately file electronically?
I only did all this about ten days ago. Where does it all come from, and why?
And why, La Redoute, when you send me a sodding letter almost every week with my customer number on it, can I not access my web account when I want to buy a new top, because that self same number is not now recognised? And why, when you tell me over the telephone that you've fixed it, can I still not access it two days later? What is the point of all these floods of paper and e-mail if you can't keep my account sorted out so that I can actually buy stuff? What do I have to do to get you to sort it out? You want my money, right?
And why, Mr Petplan, when I've told you that I'm not renewing my insurance with you do you keep harrassing me with unneccessary letters?
Charles was, as ever, sympathetic and kept bringing me cups of tea and telling me to calm down because he was worried about me. I don't know what I've done to deserve such a nice son, really.
Now I'm torn about tomorrow! I've sorted out my desk, caught up with all the filing and shredding and could actually get on with some writing, which is what I wanted to do when I started all this, BUT, the weather forecast for tomorrow is great, even better than it's been today and I've already agreed to go to the seaside and have a pub lunch. I know that I shall enjoy it if I go, but I've only got Monday and Friday with nothing booked for me to do next week, and after I've done the other things, I'm usually too worn out to write.
And now I have a hideously painful knee, which I'm perfectly sure is as a result of the stress I've put myself through today, so I probably won't sleep tonight.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!
The other night when I couldn't sleep, I wickedly ordered myself a new cheap slimline digital camera from Amazon. I've been dying to get a little slim lightweight one ever since I bought Charles' last year; I wanted to get the same one I bought him, but it seems to be discontinued so I've orderd another Samsung, only this one is PINK!! That's only so that I can find it easily in the depths of my handbag, of course!! I felt terribly guilty about it until Charles pointed out that the camera, with an extra 2Gb card and a PINK camera case had cost less than £70, that I reconciled myself to the fact that I'd done such an extravagant thing, but afterwards I thought that I probably should allow myself one little luxury out of the back-dated DLA lump sum. It will all disappear soon enough in electricity bills, I don't doubt.
Now that I've stopped feeling guilty about it, I'm impatient to get my mitts on it. The card and the case, which came from Amazon associates have already arrived, and I really thought the camera would come today, but no. Sulk!
And where are my cheap purple slouch boots that I ordered a week or more ago? I want to flash them at my next writing course!
I think I'd better have an early night (for me) if I'm going to be fresh for a day out tomorrow!
